This is our COURTNEY! I AM CURIOUS™ series wherein you ask and I answer! Specifically, this is a series for questions about my personal experiences, perspectives and life lessons.
I coined the term the “Workplace Relationship Expert” by 1999 and have been using it in my professional materials since that time! The reason is that I research and write about workplace interpersonal relationships that impact organizational outcomes (between management and staff, between peers, etc.). Definition of Workplace: “a place (as a shop or factory) where work is done” Workplace. (n.d.). Retrieved August 6, 2014, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/workplace Definition of Relationship: “: the way in which two or more people, groups, countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal with each other : a romantic or sexual friendship between two people : the way in which two or more people or things are connected” Relationship. (n.d.). Retrieved August 6, 2014, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/relationship What happens at work is not isolated to work process and goals. It is largely impacted by the internal relationship motives people have not addressed (which results in harassment, bullying abuse, illegal employment decisions, etc.). My job is to address that reality and provide consequence and clarity of the individual choices that team members decide to make. What led to my identification as 'The Workplace Relationship Expert'? 1) I started dealing with workplace legal issues (wrongful termination, etc.) as an attorney at my law firm (which I opened in 1998). 2) I had numerous clients that I helped with cases where their employer had allegedly not complied with the law (hiring, evaluations, discipline, termination, etc.). 3) I was shocked to observe well known and successful organizations that had individual staff members engage in inappropriate and potentially illegal behavior. 4) I therefore started my corporate education, training and consulting practice specifically to be part of a proactive solution for employers to prevent (or mitigate) potentially illegal employment action. I have had the pleasure of traveling This is an episode that I feel compelled to do! Our MYTH WARRIORS™ series is about targeting ideas to begin the assessment of whether they are credible or not. This episode topic is, “We All Need Someone To Believe In Us.”
No. We don’t need it. This is a myth. Definition of need: “: a situation in which someone or something must do or have something : something that a person must have : something that is needed in order to live or succeed or be happy : a strong feeling that you must have or do something” Need. (n.d.). Retrieved August 4, 2014, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/need We may want someone to believe in us. A want is not a need. The challenge is that if we convince ourselves of the lie (myth) that we need someone to believe in us and we don’t have anyone who does; we argue that we have to give up on life. No one believes in us. We don’t believe in ourselves. We engage in self-destructive behavior. We sabotage ourselves. We befriend bitterness, regret and anger. We waste each day mired in self-pity. Of course, it is wonderful if someone believes in you! If many people believe in you, congratulations! You are very fortunate! Yet, that is not a guarantee of any specific outcome (e.g., success, wealth, etc.). It is also not an entitlement. Just because your grandfather, sister, best friend and 7th grade teacher believe in you and have told you that you are special and super-awesome, does not mean that the rest of the world shares that same sentiment. We are all judged as adults as individuals. Potential is just that. It is not purpose and it is not rewarded. We all have potential. The issue with this [...] Our MANAGEMENT MAGICIANS™ series is dedicated to those exceptional few who step forward to serve as guides, sages and responsible parties for others in pursuit of the greater good for society and their organization! These are managers who redefine their job titles to ensure their own personal contentment as they motivate, monitor and mentor their team members each day. The “magic” that a talented manager is able to create changes their lives, the lives of their team members and ripples throughout the larger society. We salute their sacrifices and share their techniques and “secrets” to achieving sustained positive experiences for themselves, clients, customers, peers, team members, and the public at large! This episode is, “Are Your Insecurities and Fears Preventing Employee Empowerment?”
Yes. To clarify, although this show is part of our MANAGEMENT MAGICIANS™ series we are obviously not addressing the existing management magicians when we discuss individuals who are suffering from insecurities and fears that hurt their organization (and themselves). These individuals may aspire to be management magicians in the future (or they may have been so at some time in the past and hope to return to that state). It is unhealthy for a person to be prevented from using logic and data to make decisions and instead to base actions on their fears and insecurities. 1) The sufferer of the afflictions of raging fears and insecurities needs help and treatment as soon as possible to get them on the path to recovery. Popular culture cruelly ridicules people afflicted with fears and insecurities that appear to be irrational (fear of butterflies, etc.). Aren’t all fears and insecurities equal? We will want to view our fears and insecurities as ‘real’ (and often have explanations for why they are rational). We want to view other people’s fears and insecurities as silly. Isn’t it all subjective? Isn’t the issue the fear and insecurity (and the toll they take) and not what triggers the fear and insecurity? We should not judge others as we are not immune to the same challenges. 2) What toll does the manager who is motivated by their fear and insecurity take on their organization? From the Washington Post [...] This series is designed for the statistically rare, yet often overlooked, self-employed individual who marches to their own drummer and loves it! This is not a series for people who want to consider future self-employment (aspiring) and how to become self-employed. This is a series for existing self-employment individuals. A very small number of people are self-employed ‘full-time’ (not the best term but it does convey the intended meaning).
How are we defining self-employed in this series? Definition of Self-employed - ": earning income directly from one's own business, trade, or profession rather than as a specified salary or wages from an employer” Self-employed. (n.d.). Retrieved August 4, 2014, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/self-employed There is a very different professional situation for a self-employed person who operates as their own safety net. No guaranteed paycheck, no benefits. Self-employment is a joy for those who value autonomy and possess high levels of self-discipline. From Bloomberg Businessweek, “self-employed people are happier with their jobs than the wage-employed. According to the Pew report, "Nearly four-in-ten self-employed workers (39%) say they are 'completely satisfied' with their jobs, compared with 28% of all wage or salaried employees." This is consistent with earlier studies showing that, in a wide range of countries, a higher percentage of the self-employed are satisfied or very satisfied with their jobs than the wage employed.” (http://www.businessweek.com/smallbiz/content/apr2010/sb2010041_151187.htm) Why are we referring to the series as self-employment ecstasy? Because the data shares that this group (self-employed) are happier than the non self-employed. Definition of Ecstasy - “a state of very great happiness : extreme delight” Ecstasy. (n.d.). Retrieved August 4, 2014, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ecstasy Due to the higher levels of happiness for self-employed individuals, this series in entitled, SELF-EMPLOYMENT ECSTASY™! In this series we will explore that small percentage (about 11% in the US as per Pew Research at http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2009/09/17/take-this-job-and-love-it/). The population of self-employed in the US is also decreasing. “For the first century of its existence, the United States economy was dominated by independent workers. […] Self-employed farmers, ranchers, hunters, fishermen, and loggers made up more than 8% of the workforce in the late 1940s. Now it’s less than 1%.” (http://blogs.hbr.org/2014/02/where-are-all-the-self-employed-workers/) This small minority of individuals has unique and often overlooked challenges and motivations. From Pew Research [...] |
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